Nadya Suleman appeared on Oprah yesterday to explain her decisions and clear up misunderstandings regarding her decision to have eight more children, when she was already a single unemployed mother of six children.
On how being an only child contributed to her decision to have so many kids: “I feel as though I was so caught up with my own childish desires to compensate. I’ve always coveted that connection, that attachment to another being. And the connection felt safer with children than with a significant other, more predictable. The security—I was hungering for the security.”
On feeling any regret: “We’re surviving. We’re so busy going, going, going, moving, moving, moving, trying to keep up that you don’t have time to think, to reflect, to feel anything. And it is a choice. I own all of the responsibility for my poor choices in the past. Do I regret [it]? You can’t regret children. But the choices were childish. They were immature. They were selfish. Are we defined by our choices? Our behavior? Our actions? No. I don’t believe that defines our worth. I feel as though I wasn’t thinking at that time. If I could go back, would I make different choices? Maybe. At this point, I know and I need to teach my children that we need to learn, we need to grow, we need to keep on growing and transcending, and we need to make the best possible choices. And when we make poor choices, all you can do is really, really learn from that and grow from that. Try not to repeat it.”
On having more children: “At this point in my life, that is the furthest thing that I would ever even imagine. I cannot grow additional eyes or hands. I’m not an octopus. I can barely give them — nobody could, not two people, not four people even could give them — all the emotional, psychological and physical needs.”
On her guilt: “I live every single day every hour of the day with a tremendous amount of guilt. And I feel guilty when I hold the one or two and then that I can’t be there for the others. And they’re crying. And then I feel guilty. Look at the older ones. They all have different unique needs. And I’ll live with this forever. But all I can do now is keep on going, keep moving.”
On providing for her kids: “I will do anything in my power to secure what I need to, on my own, without exploiting my children, to secure revenue so I can provide that. I know that sounds selfish, but I breathe for my children. I wake up for my children. I will do anything to secure the revenue on my own to provide for these kids.”